I felt a haiku
would be just right for this post.
Enjoy this haiku.
It's not about war,
Only to reveal the truth.
But most cannot hear.
Friday, 15 April 2011
stay strong
I still remember that night...when they called. It was cold and silent in the house and the telephone rang like a death bell.
"...Hello?" I whispered, too frightened to make a noise any louder than that.
There was crying on the other line...
"Hello? Hello?" My voice grew more frantic.
"Ss-sophh-iee pas-ass-edd a-aawa-ay..." The words were interrupted by sobs.
My heart sank. I couldn't believe this was happening...the more real it seemed, the more tears fell from my eyes. Sophie became my step-sister when I was thirteen, and I hated her; more than anything, especially when it was her and her dad that caused my real family to be broken like this. I wanted her to get out of my life, and now God had granted me that wish. But now, I loved her, she was a dear sister to me. No matter how much hate I fumed towards her, she'd always return a greater amount of love. And that made me hate her even more...how optimistic and happy she always was. She made fast friends at my high school, every night, the phone would always be ringing for Sophie, and not me. And what annoyed me the most is Mom, who always says, "Look at darling Sophie, why can't you be more obedient and helpful as her?"
But all this hatred changed when just three years ago, we found out that she was diagnosed with a disease... spinocerebellar ataxia, which caused her to lose all control over her body. As time passed, she got worse and in time, she lost the ability to talk...
I dropped the phone and it dangled hopelessly against the wall.
I dizzily walked up to my room and collapsed on my bed, where I shed tears...for a very long time.
My eyes were blurred, I blink the tears away. I was outside, lying outside on the backyard, while the heavy rain splatters ruthlessly on my face. It was a storm in my head too...when I received the devastating news: Sophie was diagnosed with spinocerebellar ataxia. Mom came home crying and refused to leave her room. But what upsets me the most is that Sophie...she's always so positive about things. And this time, it's no different; she came home, even smiling, and assuring that everything is alright. I yelled at her, called her stupid to be so happy to have this stupid disease. I told her she was the weirdest person and the most annoying person I've ever met. And I also told her I hated her and wanted her out of my life.
But I didn't mean any of that...
My heart was in pieces...just this February we began to bond and actually became sisters. We would stay up late every night, talking and laughing. But all this changed. She was to be admitted into a hospital in less than a month...I'll barely see her again...
"Luce, come in, you'll catch a cold like this." I turned. It was Sophie, she was holding an umbrella, her face pleading me to come in. I turned away coldly and looked up at the stormy clouds raining sadness on my face.
"Luce...don't be like this. I have to stay strong during this time of my life and fight this...I can't give up, I won't. I'm not going to lose without this battle. You-"
The scene changed. It was brighter and I was sitting on a chair, facing Sophie, who was sitting on a hospital bed, with teary eyes, falling uncontrollably down my cheeks, one after the other...
"You need to be brave and stay strong for me, kay Luce?" Taking my hands in hers, she smiled.
I nodded, sniffling.
"Kay," she smiled even brighter, then continued, "Love you Luce, you're the best sister and friend I can ever have."
I can't believe how she can still forgive and love me even after all the rude and hurtful things I hurled at her. I've made her life miserable for so long and yet she can still love me and acknowledge me as her sister?
I sniffed and replied back shakily, "Love you too Sophe, but please, don't leave me in this place alone..."
She smiled, "I won't, I'll always be here with you." We both knew that physically, that wasn't going to be the case. She lost the ability to walk already and can barely feed herself. Her words were getting plainer and shorter and the doctor said that soon, she'll start losing the ability to talk and write. But my heart felt assured anyways. I watched tearfully as the nurses wheeled her out for her weekly check-up. Waving goodbye, her smile was as brilliant as ever. I've never seen a more beautiful person than that...she was an angel sent to care for me from heaven.
I walked down the hospital corridor, trying not to think depressing thoughts. But as much as Sophie comforts me, my heart still felt lonely. All this was too unbearable but I'm gonna fight through it to the end, with my sister.
Hope you enjoyed the read!
liz :{D
p.s.: I decided to write another one cuz I didn't like the other one...heh (and the disease was inspiration from the japanese drama (haven't watched it), One Litre of Tears)
"...Hello?" I whispered, too frightened to make a noise any louder than that.
There was crying on the other line...
"Hello? Hello?" My voice grew more frantic.
"Ss-sophh-iee pas-ass-edd a-aawa-ay..." The words were interrupted by sobs.
My heart sank. I couldn't believe this was happening...the more real it seemed, the more tears fell from my eyes. Sophie became my step-sister when I was thirteen, and I hated her; more than anything, especially when it was her and her dad that caused my real family to be broken like this. I wanted her to get out of my life, and now God had granted me that wish. But now, I loved her, she was a dear sister to me. No matter how much hate I fumed towards her, she'd always return a greater amount of love. And that made me hate her even more...how optimistic and happy she always was. She made fast friends at my high school, every night, the phone would always be ringing for Sophie, and not me. And what annoyed me the most is Mom, who always says, "Look at darling Sophie, why can't you be more obedient and helpful as her?"
But all this hatred changed when just three years ago, we found out that she was diagnosed with a disease... spinocerebellar ataxia, which caused her to lose all control over her body. As time passed, she got worse and in time, she lost the ability to talk...
I dropped the phone and it dangled hopelessly against the wall.
I dizzily walked up to my room and collapsed on my bed, where I shed tears...for a very long time.
My eyes were blurred, I blink the tears away. I was outside, lying outside on the backyard, while the heavy rain splatters ruthlessly on my face. It was a storm in my head too...when I received the devastating news: Sophie was diagnosed with spinocerebellar ataxia. Mom came home crying and refused to leave her room. But what upsets me the most is that Sophie...she's always so positive about things. And this time, it's no different; she came home, even smiling, and assuring that everything is alright. I yelled at her, called her stupid to be so happy to have this stupid disease. I told her she was the weirdest person and the most annoying person I've ever met. And I also told her I hated her and wanted her out of my life.
But I didn't mean any of that...
My heart was in pieces...just this February we began to bond and actually became sisters. We would stay up late every night, talking and laughing. But all this changed. She was to be admitted into a hospital in less than a month...I'll barely see her again...
"Luce, come in, you'll catch a cold like this." I turned. It was Sophie, she was holding an umbrella, her face pleading me to come in. I turned away coldly and looked up at the stormy clouds raining sadness on my face.
"Luce...don't be like this. I have to stay strong during this time of my life and fight this...I can't give up, I won't. I'm not going to lose without this battle. You-"
The scene changed. It was brighter and I was sitting on a chair, facing Sophie, who was sitting on a hospital bed, with teary eyes, falling uncontrollably down my cheeks, one after the other...
"You need to be brave and stay strong for me, kay Luce?" Taking my hands in hers, she smiled.
I nodded, sniffling.
"Kay," she smiled even brighter, then continued, "Love you Luce, you're the best sister and friend I can ever have."
I can't believe how she can still forgive and love me even after all the rude and hurtful things I hurled at her. I've made her life miserable for so long and yet she can still love me and acknowledge me as her sister?
I sniffed and replied back shakily, "Love you too Sophe, but please, don't leave me in this place alone..."
She smiled, "I won't, I'll always be here with you." We both knew that physically, that wasn't going to be the case. She lost the ability to walk already and can barely feed herself. Her words were getting plainer and shorter and the doctor said that soon, she'll start losing the ability to talk and write. But my heart felt assured anyways. I watched tearfully as the nurses wheeled her out for her weekly check-up. Waving goodbye, her smile was as brilliant as ever. I've never seen a more beautiful person than that...she was an angel sent to care for me from heaven.
I walked down the hospital corridor, trying not to think depressing thoughts. But as much as Sophie comforts me, my heart still felt lonely. All this was too unbearable but I'm gonna fight through it to the end, with my sister.
Hope you enjoyed the read!
liz :{D
p.s.: I decided to write another one cuz I didn't like the other one...heh (and the disease was inspiration from the japanese drama (haven't watched it), One Litre of Tears)
Thursday, 7 April 2011
muh seksi voustache :{D
this is totally unrelated to SH5 but it's 12:13 AM and I'm terribly bored.
LOOK AT MUH SEKSI VOUSTACHE :{D TEEHEE. Kay, peace out
liz :{D
seksi voustache, seksi voustache, seksi voustache, seksi voustache
i like their seksi voustaches hehe (btw found 'em on google images)
LOOK AT MUH SEKSI VOUSTACHE :{D TEEHEE. Kay, peace out
liz :{D
seksi voustache, seksi voustache, seksi voustache, seksi voustache
i like their seksi voustaches hehe (btw found 'em on google images)
Sunday, 3 April 2011
slaughterhouse five and ....pride & prejudice? o_O
Please note that this was written upon request from ding dong. (Ding dong, be glad >.> I spent quite a while on this just for you grrr). Also, the connections are based on the movie, not the book.
So..recently, I watched the amazing Classic Pride & Prejudice avec my mom and oh my, my, my, was Mr Darcy charming *o*
I'll be honest; when I first saw the DVD Cover, I was a tad bit disappointed when I saw the actor who played Mr Darcy. I mean, why couldn't they cast Orlando Bloom? He was so attractive and already captured several ladies' hearts in the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Troy, and of course, Pirates of the Caribbean. But to my surprise, as the movie progressed, I was enchanted by Darcy, who barely had any lines throughout the movie (maybe he had a bit more?). But anyways, that's not the point..point is, today, I'm gonna relate this classic to Vonnegut's Children's Crusade. (Oh dear... -_-)
SO. First off! .......
Ahem, first off! .........
Gaahh..can't think of anything, I'll get back to you on this..
(Two days later)
I GOT ONE.
In Pride & Prejudice, Lizzie Bennett (main character) is the second-oldest of five sisters, whose mother greatly wishes for her daughters to marry*. When Mr. Darcy came to the little town of Meryton, Lizzie was greatly prejudiced towards Mr. Darcy and thought him to be proud, arrogant, and uninteresting and deemed him as the "last person in the world she will ever marry." As the story progresses, they both begin to fall for each other and Lizzie realizes Mr Darcy's generous compassion.
This (after much thought) is sort of like how I felt towards Billy Pilgrim (minus the sentimentality and attraction). When I was first introduced to Billy, I thought him a ridiculously, hopelessly depressing character. I mean, who can get more depressing than that? Sure, there are times in your life when you don't have the courage to do something but just to be willing to die like that? Come on, dude. (This is referring to the part in the novel when Billy, Roland and the other two "musketeers" were running from the Germans and Billy just wanted to stay behind and die.)
So throughout the novel, you could say I was pretty prejudiced towards Billy, assuming he would chicken out whenever he was faced with a dilemma. Or just going with the flow and not standing up for himself. He even married Valencia and didn't even love her or cared about the status and money he would inherit, but just went along with everything and did as he was told. Oh Billy.. -_-
So when those Tralfamadorians kidnapped Billy and he was travelling through time and did whatever else he was doing. I did not think he would go to New York and announce it on the radio. With his personality, many would assume that the only thing he would've done was to keep quiet and just continue on living with his life.
When he ended up in the hospital after the plane crash, what he said to the Rumfoord (the professor with the hospital bed beside Billy's) also surprised me. Rumfoord was interested in the Dresden bombing, which Billy experienced first-hand. So I was pretty taken-back when Billy told Rumfoord that he witnessed the bombing, even when Rumfoord rudely displayed his disliking towards Billy. Again, knowing Billy, you would think he'd just keep quiet and ignore Rumfoord's comment. But instead, he spoke out again and informed the professor that he himself was there at Dresden. This is also pretty shocking because soldiers (and doctors even) who witnessed war and death first-hand never share their experiences with anyone.
Billy changed a lot throughout the novel, or maybe the Tralfamadorians unleashed a courageous aspect of him, or maybe Vonnegut just felt like throwing that in into Billy's character to throw me off, grrr >>
But anyways, although the characters of Billy and Darcy are completely different, they do share one similarity: proneness to prejudice.
Ding dong, HA MISSION ACCOMPLISHED xD
Kay, bye guys
liz (...man that was tough.. >.<)
*Back in the day when Jane Austen wrote P&P, women were ineligible to receive any inheritance from their fathers, even if they were born first. All inheritance would go to the next male relation. So, it's understandable that Mrs Bennett would want her daughters married for if Mr Bennett (the father) passed, her and the girls will be left without a home and without money.
So..recently, I watched the amazing Classic Pride & Prejudice avec my mom and oh my, my, my, was Mr Darcy charming *o*
I'll be honest; when I first saw the DVD Cover, I was a tad bit disappointed when I saw the actor who played Mr Darcy. I mean, why couldn't they cast Orlando Bloom? He was so attractive and already captured several ladies' hearts in the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Troy, and of course, Pirates of the Caribbean. But to my surprise, as the movie progressed, I was enchanted by Darcy, who barely had any lines throughout the movie (maybe he had a bit more?). But anyways, that's not the point..point is, today, I'm gonna relate this classic to Vonnegut's Children's Crusade. (Oh dear... -_-)
SO. First off! .......
Ahem, first off! .........
Gaahh..can't think of anything, I'll get back to you on this..
(Two days later)
I GOT ONE.
In Pride & Prejudice, Lizzie Bennett (main character) is the second-oldest of five sisters, whose mother greatly wishes for her daughters to marry*. When Mr. Darcy came to the little town of Meryton, Lizzie was greatly prejudiced towards Mr. Darcy and thought him to be proud, arrogant, and uninteresting and deemed him as the "last person in the world she will ever marry." As the story progresses, they both begin to fall for each other and Lizzie realizes Mr Darcy's generous compassion.
This (after much thought) is sort of like how I felt towards Billy Pilgrim (minus the sentimentality and attraction). When I was first introduced to Billy, I thought him a ridiculously, hopelessly depressing character. I mean, who can get more depressing than that? Sure, there are times in your life when you don't have the courage to do something but just to be willing to die like that? Come on, dude. (This is referring to the part in the novel when Billy, Roland and the other two "musketeers" were running from the Germans and Billy just wanted to stay behind and die.)
So throughout the novel, you could say I was pretty prejudiced towards Billy, assuming he would chicken out whenever he was faced with a dilemma. Or just going with the flow and not standing up for himself. He even married Valencia and didn't even love her or cared about the status and money he would inherit, but just went along with everything and did as he was told. Oh Billy.. -_-
So when those Tralfamadorians kidnapped Billy and he was travelling through time and did whatever else he was doing. I did not think he would go to New York and announce it on the radio. With his personality, many would assume that the only thing he would've done was to keep quiet and just continue on living with his life.
When he ended up in the hospital after the plane crash, what he said to the Rumfoord (the professor with the hospital bed beside Billy's) also surprised me. Rumfoord was interested in the Dresden bombing, which Billy experienced first-hand. So I was pretty taken-back when Billy told Rumfoord that he witnessed the bombing, even when Rumfoord rudely displayed his disliking towards Billy. Again, knowing Billy, you would think he'd just keep quiet and ignore Rumfoord's comment. But instead, he spoke out again and informed the professor that he himself was there at Dresden. This is also pretty shocking because soldiers (and doctors even) who witnessed war and death first-hand never share their experiences with anyone.
Billy changed a lot throughout the novel, or maybe the Tralfamadorians unleashed a courageous aspect of him, or maybe Vonnegut just felt like throwing that in into Billy's character to throw me off, grrr >>
But anyways, although the characters of Billy and Darcy are completely different, they do share one similarity: proneness to prejudice.
Ding dong, HA MISSION ACCOMPLISHED xD
Kay, bye guys
liz (...man that was tough.. >.<)
*Back in the day when Jane Austen wrote P&P, women were ineligible to receive any inheritance from their fathers, even if they were born first. All inheritance would go to the next male relation. So, it's understandable that Mrs Bennett would want her daughters married for if Mr Bennett (the father) passed, her and the girls will be left without a home and without money.
Tuesday, 29 March 2011
If I were to write my very own story..
If I were to write my own story, I would most definitely choose to write a typical, clichéd, stereotypical, and unoriginal love story twisted with clichés and stereotypical story lines and everything else in a love story that will never actually happen in real life. That was Plan A. ^ But then I thought of an even better Plan A. I was originally thinking of going with the love story idea (because that's all my dramas bombard me with). But then, all of a sudden, I thought of this really scary mystery movie (not to mention horrific, graphic, gory, and psychologically twisted) I watched during the break and decided to go along the theme of that instead (the mystery aspect, not the gore). I mean, mystery novels/movies/shows are so interesting. Especially the ones where the ending completely throws you off and makes you go "OMG NO WAY" at the end. Writing a mystery novel is kind of like working backwards; the author (in this case, moi) would have to think of what the solved mystery will be and write the story backwards, from the ending to the beginning. Maybe it's because of the annuity stuff we're learning in Math right now that makes me think backwards o_o But anyways, if I were to write my own story, I would most definitely write a mystery novel. I love mysteries. Sometimes it makes me so confused and clueless throughout and makes me wanna yell "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?" but I also love the stimulating sensation you get when you find out the who the killer is at the end. The general storyline would probably be a murder mystery, because I love the genre. But unlike Vonnegut and Criminal Minds, I wouldn't reveal the killer until the very end. And I'll create many characters readers will suspect so it will be even more thrilling when the real killer is revealed in the end. Of course every murder mystery needs its suspense and captivating character leads. Combining some ideas from Castle and 4th Period Murder Mystery, I'll have a charismatic and bold female lead (a mix of Kate Beckett from Castle and Lizzie Bennett from Pride & Prejudice and Scarlett O'Hara from Gone with the Wind --> what a wonderful character mixture o_o) and a male lead. Maybe if I feel like it, I'll incorporate a little love story brewing between the main characters to attract more consumers. I mean, who doesn't love a heart-warming love story mixed with feisty action and enchanting mystery? ;DAnd for every female lead, there must be an annoying yet beautifully charming male lead following at her tail (maybe not must, but definitely for my novel). Like mentioned before, I'd definitely add a few more minor characters than usual to throw the reader off and also make the ending so dramatic and amazing that I'll leave the readers wanting for more and make millions of dollars with this amazing book that will hit Number 1 on book charts worldwide. but that'll only happen if I one day to feel like spending a long period of time writing a novel.In the mean time, I'll get back to my Castle episodes :D (and dramas hehe)byebye, lizP.S.: may be re-edited due to a lack of making sense throughout >.<btw, photo credit and copyright infringement as well as all the rights reserved goes to Lady-Tori at www.deviantart.com.
Aww even little danbo is reading *o*
Aww even little danbo is reading *o*
Monday, 7 March 2011
banning books, oui ou non?
First, bonjour again :D (viidragon: what's with the french? o_o taewang: leave me alone >.<)
Second, OMGEE ITS MARCH ALREADY OMG NO WAY......
sorry, just had to throw that out there >.< but honestly, time passes by a heck lot quicker when youre old.. -_-
So, blogging bout the censoring of Slaughterhouse 5. There are many themes in the novel that raises several controversies and criticisms when it was first published then released. Even today, this controversial book is banned in many schools in America due to the thematic elements of the novel. Personally, I don't think any book should be banned. I mean, a book itself is the philosophical thoughts of an author, the message(s) he/she is telling the world. Banning a book is like disregarding an author's opinion. Since we live in a free nation, shouldn't the banning of books be illegal? Well it's a different story if you live in an autocratic government, but then again, your book would probably not be published in the first place. But think about it, Slaughterhouse 5, although it provides readers with a first-hand historical account of some things that occurred during WWII, is the opinions Vonnegut has regarding the WWII. So why hush him up? Isn't there some saying that goes like "If you silence a guy, he'll talk ten times louder?" (or did I just make that up? o_o) From all that criticism thrown at Vonnegut about Slaughterhouse 5, it probably also brought up more issues for America involving themselves in the Vietnam War, which probably led to activist groups and social groups and the like. So, Vonnegut should thank the critics that hurled insults at this masterpiece, for if it weren't for them and their attempts at trying to ban this novel, Slaughterhouse 5 would not have received so many popular recognition, or maybe that was his intent in the first place..
And enjoy this picturesque scene of Dresden (don't know where exactly this place is). Oh btw, all rights reserved, copyright infringement and the other legal publication stuff belongs to Thaess@deviantart.com
blog some more laters (in the month >.<),
liz
p.s.: MARCH BREAK IS COMING SOOOOOON :D
Second, OMGEE ITS MARCH ALREADY OMG NO WAY......
sorry, just had to throw that out there >.< but honestly, time passes by a heck lot quicker when youre old.. -_-
So, blogging bout the censoring of Slaughterhouse 5. There are many themes in the novel that raises several controversies and criticisms when it was first published then released. Even today, this controversial book is banned in many schools in America due to the thematic elements of the novel. Personally, I don't think any book should be banned. I mean, a book itself is the philosophical thoughts of an author, the message(s) he/she is telling the world. Banning a book is like disregarding an author's opinion. Since we live in a free nation, shouldn't the banning of books be illegal? Well it's a different story if you live in an autocratic government, but then again, your book would probably not be published in the first place. But think about it, Slaughterhouse 5, although it provides readers with a first-hand historical account of some things that occurred during WWII, is the opinions Vonnegut has regarding the WWII. So why hush him up? Isn't there some saying that goes like "If you silence a guy, he'll talk ten times louder?" (or did I just make that up? o_o) From all that criticism thrown at Vonnegut about Slaughterhouse 5, it probably also brought up more issues for America involving themselves in the Vietnam War, which probably led to activist groups and social groups and the like. So, Vonnegut should thank the critics that hurled insults at this masterpiece, for if it weren't for them and their attempts at trying to ban this novel, Slaughterhouse 5 would not have received so many popular recognition, or maybe that was his intent in the first place..
And enjoy this picturesque scene of Dresden (don't know where exactly this place is). Oh btw, all rights reserved, copyright infringement and the other legal publication stuff belongs to Thaess@deviantart.com
blog some more laters (in the month >.<),
liz
p.s.: MARCH BREAK IS COMING SOOOOOON :D
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Friday, 4 March 2011
Not afraid to go near the cliff's edge.
"I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you can see all kinds of things you can't see from the center..."
- Kurt Vonnegut
Hmm..how interesting.. o_OTo me, this translates to: "It's boring in the center so I'll stay close to wherever things are interesting." I mean, people get bored easily..who wants to do boring things all their lives? Not me, I rather be exposed to the mysteries of this world and whatever else it throws, rather than hiding out in the dark staying "comfortable" forever. With society these days, all the technology and other media influences have allowed teenagers to adapt to changes quickly. So what's the down side of coming of that shell and embracing the beauty of the reality of life? I mean, sure, life and the reality of it can get scary sometimes but how are you going to grow and mature if you can't overcome this obstacle? Gonna use another analogy about life: it's a journey, a series of different paths leading to many more different endings . Every "intersection" you come to, you need to choose wisely about which path to take, each will have a different outcome for your life. If you can't get through the first intersection, how are you going to get through the one after that that and so on? There are no shortcuts, no floo powder that can get you from here to there.
So embrace it, don't run or hide. Even if it will get tough sometimes, face those challenges and fight those obstacles and most of all, don't be like Billy Pilgrim.
peace out,
liz
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